So who am I, what’s my story, and how the hell did I end up creating this website?
Well, if you’re sitting comfortably, then I’ll begin…
My name is Brad, I live on the south coast of England (not far from London), I’m 30 years old and I’m currently recovering from the worst 5 years of my life (but I’ll tell you more about that later).
My journey down the “rabbit hole” began in the summer of 2004, when my life was very, very different. In 2004 I had just graduated from university and was living with my girlfriend, Lily, in a great little apartment overlooking the ocean. I was working as a salesman for a cable TV firm and doing pretty well financially, I had a good social life, no major problems at all and life was ticking along just fine. I certainly had no idea that the world I lived in and the life I knew so well would soon turn upside down in every conceivable way.
I’ve come to understand over the years that most of the events that have happened throughout my life haven’t occurred by “chance” or by “accident” and even something as seemingly insignificant as getting a job with a cable TV firm has, in hindsight, proven to be the essential first step on my journey towards truth. You see, I would never of paid for cable TV, but because I worked for the Cable firm it was offered free of charge and just 2 months later a programme broadcast on the Sci-Fi channel would send me tumbling down the rabbit hole and begin my journey into “Wonderland”.
I’ve always had an interest in the “paranormal” ever since I was a kid and I was fascinated by ghosts, ufos and all kinds of “weird” stuff. I remember my best friend and me would often sit outside at night, looking up at the night sky and talk about UFO’s, Aliens and what we thought was really out there. We were strange kids! So, when one afternoon, while I pottered about at home, I noticed a documentary was coming on next about UFOs. I thought “cool, this will be worth a watch”.
At the time I believed that UFO’s could possibly exist, but I really didn’t think there was a lot of evidence to prove it. I thought that “maybe one day” there would be some answers. But as I sat down to watch the documentary I had no idea that answers would start coming to me that very day and that a clip of video footage, shown about half way through, would be firmly imprinted into my memory for the rest of my life.
I can’t say I remember much else about the documentary at all, but that one piece of video footage would be responsible for changing the entire direction of my life and be the catalyst for turning my life upside down. The footage started quite ordinary, with some type of an object in the sky and it didn’t immediately appear as anything special. It was a blury, stationary, disk shaped object filmed during the day. But then it began to move. It moved like nothing I had ever seen before! At incredible speeds it moved in and out of shot and made complete right angle turns one after another. It was almost impossible to comprehend what I was looking at. My intuition literally ignited! It was like something powerfully activated in my mind, like a download of “orders”, and I just knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that what I was looking at there on my TV screen was a real Alien spacecraft!
I was absolutely blown away and was instantly filled with an incredible NEED to understand the WHOLE TRUTH about UFOs. Something had certainly awoken inside of me in a powerful way. It was an overwhelming hunger to learn the truth and it was just absolutely essential for me to discover as much as I could, as quickly as I could. I had no idea though, that this need to know everything would eventually lead me into very strange territory indeed.
After the programme had finished, I jumped straight onto Amazon.com and typed “UFOs” into the book section. I didn’t expect to find much, so I was shocked when hundreds of book results came up! I couldn’t believe it! There was so much information out there! I ordered my first three books on the subject there and then and once they arrived, a few days later, my girlfriend thought I had gone a little nuts, as I sat on the sofa after work most evenings, just devouring page after page and book after book!
After reading the first book; “The Alien Agenda”by Jim Marrs, I was already convinced that UFOs were real and were Extra-terrestrial in origin, but I continued to read many books on the subject over the following weeks and months and with every book and case study I read my belief was cemented even more. After a couple of months my research moved into the next logical area of Alien abductions and this obviously opened my mind to an even greater degree. One of the key researchers I came across on the subject was Budd Hopkins, a guy who had spent 30 years as a Psychologist researching the phenomena, and his findings were absolutely staggering! And of course I can’t forget the incredible Travis Walton story! This was one of the most compelling cases I came across throughout my research and if you’ve only seen the movie about it called “Fire in the Sky” then you need to get hold of the book! Trust me.
My understanding of the UFO and Alien phenomena was growing very quickly, but what was also interesting, was that my understanding of “ghosts” and the “spirit world” was also expanding at the same time and at the same rate. My girlfriend and me watched a programme called “Most Haunted”, religiously every week, for months and if you’ve not heard of it, it was a ghost detective show, where a team of investigators would spend a night in a “haunted house” with their night vision equipment etc and I tell you what, some of the footage they captured was absolutely incredible! Hence to say, my belief in other levels of existence had blown wide open as well!
Here I was only 6 months into my search for truth and I already knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that Aliens were real and were visiting Earth and that there were other “plains of existence” where “spirits” and other “entities” lived. But even though I was fascinated by my findings, I just knew there was more to know. A lot more.
I began to question why UFOs and the Alien presence was being covered up by governments across the world and why the idea of ghosts and other levels of existence was generally laughed at by the mainstream? I mean come on, if everyone knew we weren’t alone in the universe and that we don’t actually die, then the world would be a very different place, for the better. It made no sense that this information was being kept from people? Why why why?
My answers quickly began to come though, as I was soon lead to a book by Patricia Cori called; “The Cosmos of Soul”. In the book she touched upon the subject of a “secret government”, a control group who were really in control of the planet, behind the scenes, and who had a very malevolent agenda for humanity. This opened my mind to the idea of a “shadow government” and helped me understand why the great truths of our world were being covered up, but this was really just an initial introduction to the subject for me and it wouldn’t be until finding David Icke’s work, a couple of months later, that the big pieces of the puzzle would start dropping into place.
I’d never actually heard of David Icke before and I had absolutely no idea that he was fairly well known in England, from the early 1990′s onwards, basically being labeled as a “nutter”! I was too young to remember all that. So the day I came across him for the first time is very clearly imprinted in my mind, much like that UFO footage.
I would regularly go into the large Borders bookstore in town trying to find any information which could further my understanding, but would often leave frustrated with my lack of findings. But one day, in October 2005, I headed round to the Paranormal section, as usual, but this time the distinctive cover of “Children of the Matrix” was staring back at me. I Instantly felt a connection to David’s words and energy as I read the back cover and I knew that this guy could show me doors that had previously alluded me. It’s funny, I was keeping a daily journal at the time, and the entry for that day reads; “I found a new author today, David Icke, he seems to be on my wavelength”! Ha ha, I wasn’t wrong about that!
By now it was January 2006 and I sat down for the first time with “Children of the Matrix” and oh my God, that book completely blew open my mind in a way that no other source of information had! Learning about UFOs, the Alien presence and the reality of other levels of existence had certainly been incredible, but this book, quite literally, flooded my mind with the “BIG PICTURE” in one hit.
I remember getting up from the sofa after reading the opening few chapters, going to get a drink from the kitchen and looking at my reflection in the window. I said to myself “My God! I’m actually Neo in the Matrix movie”! That’s how I felt! I never felt fearful though, it was just a powerful sense of “knowing” why I am here on this planet. I knew there and then that I was going to do all I could to help get rid of these mother fuckers. These Illuminati pricks had fucked humanity for too long!
I’ve always stood up to bullys throughout my life and it seems to be deeply embedded inside of me to fight injustice, on any level, and in any form, so learning about the incredible manipulation that has taken place on this planet and continues to take place to this day, by a handful of scum fucks, literally made my blood boil!
Coming to the realization that humanity wasn’t as “fucked up” as it appeared to be, but had simply been deceived and manipulated by this controlling force was very liberating. All the world wars; Manipulated by these fuckers. All the famines across Africa; Manipulated by these fuckers! All the terrorist acts across the world; Carried out by these same fuckers! Literally every cruel and horrible event or period throughout history wasn’t caused by “human nature” but had been coldly calculated and orchestrated to happen! There was just no way I could sit back and allow these sick and twisted Illuminati fuckheads to create their “New World Order” and a “hell on Earth” for the future of humanity! No fucking way!
I was really starting to wake up spiritually now as well and could feel my consciousness shifting and opening up to new levels of reality and new levels of awareness. It was very exciting, but also very strange. One particular event during this period stands out in my mind very clearly; It was a a Saturday lunchtime and I had left my office to sit outside in the sunshine and get some air. I was outside the main shopping centre in the city, when suddenly, out of nowhere, I felt this incredible energy start to flow from my chest. Well, my heart to be more accurate. It was incredibly powerful and I was filled with this amazing sensation of love. I literally felt this energy flowing out of my heart and towards all the people around me. I could almost see it as well. It wasn’t just a feeling of love for the people around me though, it was literally like multiple beams of energy flowing from my heart to the people around me. I didn’t understand it, but it felt pretty amazing! I certainly didn’t want to go back and sell cable TV after that!
It was now February 2006 and after learning about the nature of reality from David Icke, and others about how we create our own reality with our thoughts and intentions (or at least that appeared to be the case), I brought a book on visualisation called “I Create Reality” by Christopher Westra. I followed the program he laid out in the book with great excitement, knowing that my life would soon be changing in some major ways. I got absolutely clear on the life I wanted to live and began to visualize it on a daily basis. I could literally feel my new life in the process of manifesting and I saw it so clearly in my mind every day.
I pictured myself waving goodbye to my old job and old life and moving towards a life of freedom and joy. I felt so empowered! Like the world was mine for the taking! I could do anything! Be anything! Achieve anything! I felt like I had been handed the keys to the kingdom and the life I desired was just around the corner and coming into view. Wow, life was going to be amazing from now on! I was so excited! But just as I was becoming comfortable with this feeling of total empowerment and complete control, my life was soon to take a horrifically cruel turn for the worst and leave me feeling more frightened then I had ever felt in my entire life.
The Start of the Horror
The horrific change in my circumstances began on a Wednesday night in March 2006. I had been to work that day as normal and it had just been a “typical” day. I arrived home from work, had dinner with my girlfriend and just chilled out for the rest of the evening and as I climbed into bed that night there was no way I could possibly of known what was about to occur just a few hours later. It was roughly 3am and after sleeping soundly for the past few hours, I woke up with a sudden jolt, and I knew instantly that something was terribly, terribly wrong. The whole room was spinning violently, my heart was beating so fast it felt like it was about to burst out my chest, my whole face was burning up and I felt terribly, terribly sick!
Frightened and totally disorientated, I managed to get out of bed and made my way down the hall towards the bathroom. I was terrified. I thought I was dying! I splashed cold water on my face to try and cool myself down, but things weren’t changing. I was so scared and was literally praying that I didn’t die as I held onto the sink and looked at myself in the mirror! It was utterly horrific. I just wanted it to stop. I stood, terrified, holding onto the sink, just praying that I didn’t want to die! The room just kept on spinning and I was totally disorientated and frightened to death. It just felt like it wasn’t going to stop and I had this constant image racing through my mind of my girlfriend finding me slumped on the bathroom floor later that morning and how awful it was going to be for her. Truley, truely horrific.
Fortunately though after 45 minutes of total horror my heart did begin to slow a little, my temperature reduced slightly and the room began to stop spinning. The horror was starting to fade a little as I stumbled out of the bathroom and sat on the sofa. I was very shaken, but relieved that I had survived. What the hell had just happened to me?
I awoke the next day still feeling shaken, but generally ok and I went to work as normal. I didn’t understand what had happened and quite frankly I just wanted to forget it. All I knew was I didn’t want to experience anything like that ever again. I immediately stopped drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes, thinking that maybe these stimulants had played a part in what had happened.
Nearly a month had passed without any further episodes and I began to feel a sense of relief. It looked like that horrific night was simply a one off and I could bury that terrible memory in the back of my mind and forget about it forever. I could move forward with my life once again and start tapping into my awesome power to create anything I wanted in life. Freedom and joy could be my experience once more! Unfortunatley, I had no idea that this was simply to be the “calm before the storm” and the start of unimaginable horror.
Things started again almost exactly one month later. I was at work in the office and on the phone to a customer. Things were normal one minute and then all of a sudden, without any warning, the room started spinning violently, like a switch had been turned on inside my brain. I felt instantly sick and completely disorientated. I just had to hang up the phone and made my way out of the office to the bathroom. I was in there for about 10 minutes before it became obvious that I wouldn’t be working anymore that day.
These “attacks” began to happen on a daily basis and within one week they had become worse. Much worse. Soon the spinning sensation was accompanied by an unbearably intense pressure in the centre of my head, like nothing I’d ever felt before. It felt like my brain was on fire and that my head would literally burst. It was unbearable and unimaginable torture. I had to quit work soon after, as this was happening nearly everyday and would last hours and sometimes days at a time. I was unable to function at all. I could not even do simple tasks or think clearly in any way and the pain would frequently become so unbearable that all I could do was lay on the floor holding my head.
My doctor was unable to help me, giving me different medication, which had little to no effect and as the weeks carried on without any rest bite it became clear that this condition wasn’t going to suddenly change. My life fell into complete chaos. I just did not know what was happening to me and what I was supossed to do to get better. I saw many different doctors and different specialists, I had brain scans and all kinds of tests over the next few months, but no clear explanation was given and hope was really starting to fade. My brain simply wasn’t functioning and in the space of 1 month I had gone from feeling on top of the world, knowing that I could finally take complete control of my life and manifest whatever I chose, to not even being able to function as a human being!
I tried my best to cope with the condition, but it was simply impossible. I could barley function at all. I just woke up each day hoping that things would be better, but things didn’t get better and every day was, at best a struggle, and at worst horrific torture. My girlfriend also eventually left me, as she simply couldn’t understand what had happened to me and I was totally alone, becoming a shell of the person I used to be.
I didn’t know who or where to turn to for help and as the months passed by I tried many different types of treatment and therapy, including acupuncture, hypnotherapy, chiropractic treatment, EFT, Sedona Method, Reiki and body activation treatment. But there was just no real change. There were periods where I did feel a little better, but it was always up and then down again. No treatment seemed to be the answer and during this period I was still trying to understand exactly what had happened to me. I was living in a constant nightmare that I couldn’t wake up from. I felt frightened, alone and in constant physical, mental and emotional pain.
I continued to struggle through each day and after a year with no improvement I still had little understanding of what had actually happened to me and how I was supposed to regain my health and get my life back. I spent many hours researching online trying to gain a greater understanding of what I was dealing with and I eventually began to understand that I had suffered some form of massive nervous breakdown.
My life had already been stressful leading up to this “breakdown”, as I was beginning to hate my job, my girlfriend had been suffering from severe depression and I was starting to really feel lost in life (before discovering, what I believed to be the truth, about the law of attraction and our ability to create our own reality). But once I had started to understand the true magnitude of the situation on this planet, my mind was having to deal with a lot and at the same time, my body was having to process this new “spiritual energy” and the transformation that had started to take place within me.
It is my understanding that my body simply couldn’t deal with the level of stimulation it was having to process and a complete meltdown was the result. It was like my body blew it’s circuits and it had left me in a crippling state of anxiety. But even now, after 5 years, I am still trying to fully understand what happened to me, but I believe this conclusion is basically correct.
Even though life was extremely tough after the breakdown my thirst for knowledge and my desire to understand all I could about the global conspiracy did not fade. It actually became more intense! I sat at my computer devouring as much information from as many different sources as possible. David Icke, Alex Jones, Michael Tsarion, Jordan Maxwell, anyone and everyone who could potentially help me understand more. I even attended one of David Icke’s live presentations at Brixton academy in London and even though it was a struggle for me, because of my health, it was still an incredible day and I felt my consciousness really open up during the presentation, like my spirit was expanding out of my body. A very powerful day.
I should of mentioned this book sooner, as it was actually one of the first UFO / Alien books I had read in the “early years”, but “Bringers of the Dawn” by Barbara Maciniack made a huge impact on me and has proven to be a very valuable part of my journey (even though since, I’ve have come to understand that most channelled information is suspect). In the book, Barbara channels a group of ET beings from the Pleiadian star system and I instantly connected with the information they were communicating. The Pleiadians referred to a “family of light”, and explained that many members of this “family” were here on Earth at this time to help “bust the system”.
They referred to this group as “renegades” and “mavericks” who were highly skilled and experienced at going into systems and removing darkness. This really rang true for me when I read that and I certainly felt like I was on a “mission” of some sort. I didn’t fully understand everything about this “mission” or the “Family of Light” at the time, but I knew I would eventually gain a greater understanding of this. They also referred to the “Lizzies“, a group of Reptilian beings that have had a huge involvement and influence on humanity and planet Earth for thousands of years. I didn’t know where this understanding would eventually lead many years later though.
Starting to Understand the Reptilian Aspect
After reading pretty much all of David Icke’s books, I was certainly convinced that he was correct about the Reptilian involvement in the global conspiracy and the Illuminati agenda. The main problem for me though, was it did feel a bit abstract, like it was some type of ancient history and didn’t really connect to the present day that much. I felt frustrated with the lack of information about the Reptilians beyond David’s work. I needed to know more. But where to turn?
Then in 2007 the Reptilian shapeshifting videos began to appear on Youtube. I know there’s a lot of debate over these videos, which is only to be expected with such a controversial subject, but for me, there was no doubt. They were real!
These shapeshifting videos brought a whole new level of “realness” to the subject of Reptilians. They were no longer some abstract story, they were here in front of my eyes! I began to ramp up my research into this subject and Youtube was proving to be an excellent source of information. It was at this time that I first came across Peggy Kane.
The first time I watched her interview (which is on this site under “Peggy Kane, Reverse Speech and the Reptilians”) I was intrigued by her story and the information she was presenting. She just came across as incredibly genuine and her information fitted perfectly with David Icke’s. The level of knowledge she had gained about the Reptilians through EVP and Reverse Speech research was absolutely staggering. She seemed to be so far ahead of anyone else with her understanding of the Reptilians, their manipulation of humanity and the BIG PICTURE of what we were dealing with here on this planet, even more so then David Icke, and when she spoke about the Pleiadians I just knew she was speaking truth.
It was now the end of 2007 and I really felt that I had reached a very important stage in my level of understanding and felt very strongly that I needed to start contributing and sharing what I knew. It was like new orders were being downloaded into me again and I had a massive desire to start producing documentaries to put on Youtube. I had a clear intention that I was going to make documentaries covering the 9/11 attacks and the Iraq war of 2003, as these were two “entry level” subjects for people to begin understanding the bigger truth about the global conspiracy, and the Illuminati/Reptilian agenda.
Even though I was still struggling majorly with my health, I was starting to feel a slight sense of stabilization in my mind and was happy with the progress I was making with my understanding of the “big picture”. But just as this sense of knowing and feeling of stabilization was beginning to strengthen inside of me, once again, another one of those ”turn your world upside down” situations was about to take place in my life and throw me in to a state of total and utter confusion. A level of confusion which would almost be too much for me to bare.
Understanding Religion From the Inside - The Most Confusing Time of My Life
Obviously my health condition was extremely tough to deal with, but the only advantage of the situation was that I had a lot of free time and because I spent most of my time at home (not being able to do much else), I had learnt some basic skills for making money on the internet and fortunately, within about 6 months, I had actually started to generate an income. it wasn’t a huge amount, but considering my condition, I was happy to be bringing in some extra cash.
I’ve always thrown myself into things and in order to further my business knowledge and increase my skills I decided to attend a 2 day seminar in London, during June 2008, being held by a successful home business “guru” called Dani Johnson. I didn’t have much money and paying out a few hundred pounds to attend the seminar wasn’t the easiest thing to do, but I had a very strong feeling that I needed to attend the event. My intuition just told me I had to be there. So I brought my ticket and headed up to London for the weekend.
I knew that Dani Johnson had a “spiritual” side to her teachings, as she had written a book called “Spirit Driven Success”, but I didn’t know how significant this side of the seminar would be to my life until the end of the first day.
My anxiety condition was really bad as I turned up on the Saturday morning for the start of the seminar, but to make a bad situation even worse, I hadn’t received an email from the seminar organizers informing me that the seminar had a dress code of “smart business dress”. So I turned up in my jeans and T-shirt, while everyone else was dressed in business suits! All 300 people! I was pretty anxious!
I actually believe that it was no accident that I didn’t receive that email though. I think someone or “something” knew how significant that day was going to be for me and they wanted to mess with me and possibly try and stop me from even getting there.
The first few hours of the seminar were valuable from a business perspective and I was happy with what Dani was teaching, so when I noticed she was conducting an additional 2 hour presentation at the end of the day called “Spiritual Equipping”, I felt I needed to be there. The majority of the 300 attendees also joined this part of the seminar and after a short dinner break, we were all back in the conference room and looking forward to what Dani had to share. It wasn’t long before she started talking about God and brought out the Bible. I thought to myself “oh God, I’m going to be Bible bashed with Jesus!” After everything I knew about Religion, from my research, I hardly wanted to stay in that room and listen to Jesus being preached for 2 hours.
But as I continued to sit there for a few more moments, I suddenly felt my consciousness start to shift in a very similar way to how it had done during the David Icke presentation in Brixton. I took this as a sign that I needed to stay and see where this was heading and as time moved on Dani became more a more passionate and was beginning to visibly cry with emotion as she spoke about her experiences with “God”.
Even though I didn’t agree with a lot of what she was saying, it was very captivating and as people began to get up from their chairs and move to the front of the stage, it reminded me of those church scenes I’d seen online, where crowds of people were being overwhelmed, all raising their hands in the air towards the preacher. She continued to increase her emotional intensity and she really started to became a preacher type figure and as more and more people got up from their seats and joined Dani at the front of the stage she said “there are still people that need to come forward”. I instantly felt she was talking to me. So without thinking too much about it and driven by pure curiosity, I got up from my seat and joined the crowd.
As soon as I was up at the stage with the rest of the crowd, Dani began to touch people’s heads with some type of oil, and then they instantly fell to the floor! It was quite a sight! I was on the right side of the stage and as Dani moved around the stage, towards me, I realised she was placing a cross on people’s heads with her finger. Without exception, everyone who was touched by her fell to the floor! The buzz in the crowd continued to increase and as Dani approached my side of the stage and moved closer to me, I watched with amazement as she touched the woman standing next to me, and she fell at my feet! I then looked up to see Dani’s hand moving towards my head.
Things seemed to move into slow motion as her finger made contact with my skin and I had a really strong thought pass through my mind of “whatever you do, don’t fall down”. But as soon as that thought had passed through my mind, my legs gave way.
As I hit the floor I can only describe the feeling I had as similar to an amazing drug experience. Yes, I’ve dabbled. I was totally blissed out and I felt like my consciousness had expanded out of my body. It just felt very strange. I wasn’t aware of what was going on around me too much, but I knew there were other people lying near by. I layed there on the floor for at least 30 minutes in a blissful state, but trying to understand what I was experiencing at the same time. What was going on? Why was I feeling like this after being touched by a Christian? It made no sense and went against everything I believed about Christianity.
Eventually I got to my feet and sat on the stage looking out into the conference room. There were still a few people laying on the floor and I just sat there in a very confused state trying to make sense of what I’d just experienced. I eventually left the conference room and as I sat on the underground train heading back to my friend’s flat in London my mind was trying desperately to process everything. Jesus, Christianity, the Bible, it was all nonsense and created for control. Wasn’t it? So why the hell am I having experiences like this in a Christian environment? To say I had questions would be a total understatement.
A new leg of my journey had just begun. I needed to understand what was going on with Jesus and Christianity. Was David Icke and other people I trusted really giving me the truth or were they misguided or just purposely spreading disinformation? Was Christianity the truth? What the hell was going on? What was true and what was lies? Too many questions and so much confusion. My life had already been turned upside down in 2006, could I really handle it turning upside down again? I had to know the truth whatever the cost and right on cue the next steps of my journey appeared.
The final day of the seminar had ended and I was talking with a number of people in the foyer, outside the conference room, when two women approached me and said “Brad, you’re from the south coast aren’t you?” I hadn’t remembered speaking with them during the past 2 days, so I was slightly surprised that they knew where I was from. They were Christians and went on to explain that a friend of theirs was over from California (she was also a Christian) and was staying in my home city for a few days. They asked if I would meet up with her, as she didn’t know anyone in the city. On one level it seemed a very strange request, here I was being asked by 2 strangers if I would keep their friend company for a couple of days? But even though it was odd, my intuition told me that this woman could help me understand more about the situation I was in. The whole thing seemed to be set up for me and I felt I had to go with it.
I got back home and after a couple of days of trying her number I eventually got hold of Cindy. I guess it must of seemed a little strange for her as well, that some random guy was calling her up, saying her friends had passed me her number! But after a short conversation on the phone we arranged to meet up the the next afternoon. I really had no idea what was going to come from meeting with her, but I just knew that the previous sequence of events that had led me to her was no accident and I knew that I had to continue down this path to gain the answers I seeked.
She had described herself as a tall, blond “Californian type” and as I approached the phone box, where we’d arranged to meet, I knew instantly that the blond 40 something standing there was Cindy. As we left the phone box and headed down to a cafe on the beach front, one of the first things she asked was “Are you a Christian?” It seemed like she wanted to know, right from the start, whether I was in “her gang” or something. Her friends had described her as “very prophetic” and told me that she would be able to tell me things about myself and my life and as we made our way to the cafe she had already started telling me small things about myself. It seemed that this woman could very well be the real deal and exactly what her friends at the seminar had described her as.
We sat down at a table on the beach front and began talking. I explained what had happened at the seminar and described the experiences I’d had. As I continued to share my experiences it seemed almost ordinary to Cindy and she was constantly giving her input and explaining “how amazing Jesus is”. That word “Jesus”. It just created such a feeling of resistance in me. After everything I’d learned from David Icke and others about Christianity (and all Religions) it just felt so confusing to suddenly be questioning all of that and potentially having to do a 180 in my entire belief system!
But even with all the confusion, my inner guidance was extremely strong that I had to go with this. I had to understand the truth about Christianity, whether it really was the “true path” and whether David Icke and other apparent “brilliant minds” had it completely wrong. I was in an utter state of confusion and I needed answers big time!
As we sipped our coffees, Cindy turned to me and asked “Have you accepted Jesus as your Lord and Saviour?” No I hadn’t. And the idea of doing so felt very uncomfortable indeed. But as Cindy asked me expectantly if I would accept him now, I knew any further steps down this path would require me to do so. So hesitantly, I agreed. Cindy spoke a few words for me to repeat and then she clapped her hands in celebration and said ”there are angels around you rejoicing”. I felt very uncomfortable with what had just happened, like I was being taken down a path I didn’t understand.
After we’d finished our coffees Cindy asked if I would like to come back to her hotel room and “pray”, and no, I didn’t think that was code for something else by the way :-). As soon as we’d entered her hotel room I felt an “energy” begin to come over me and, as Cindy put on some “worship” music and began to to pray, this energy became more intense. It did feel kind of good, but even so, it was a little uncomfortable at the same time. It was like a weight was coming down on me and almost pushing me to the floor. This went on for probably 30 minutes or so and this “energy” or “presence” was there with me the entire time.
Man, what was going on! This was the second “spiritual” experience I’d had in a matter of days in a Christian environment. There just seemed no way to avoid the apparent obvious, no matter how uncomfortable I felt about it; Jesus very well could be real and Christianity could possibly be the “true” path. But how in the world could it be, after everything I’d learnt? I felt like I was moving into very unfamiliar and uncomfortable territory. Could I see myself telling all my friends and family that I was a “born again Christian”? That image didn’t sit well with me at all. Not one bit.
I was feeling very alone now in a world that didn’t make sense at all. So was “Satan” real? Was he behind the entire “New World Order”? Where did the Reptilians fit into all this? Who was Satan and why was he doing this? I had so many questions, and as I met Cindy the next day, she did her best to answer my questions, but she couldn’t possibly understand my perspective. She seemed to be completely unaware of the global conspiracy and the new world order agenda on any level. She even said George Bush Jr was a “good person” and a “good Christian”! How could someone who appeared to be so connected to “God” and have “prophetic insight” not be aware of what’s going on? It made no sense and something felt very strange about all this.
Before I left the hotel room Cindy told me she was going to a Christian conference in a few days and invited me to go with her. It was a long way away and I had very little money, but, once again, the desire to continue this journey overpowered any obstacles and I booked my hotel and conference ticket. I had to get some answers and if it ment travelling across the Country to get some, then so be it.
Cindy left the next day to spend some time with friends in Birmingham (about 150 miles away) and I was now on my own. It would be another 4 days before I would be arriving for the conference and seeing her again and I spent those days trying to process and make sense of everything that was happening to me. But that was impossible to do. Nothing made sense.
Deeper Down the Christian Path
After a 6 hour train journey to Cornwall, in the south west of England, I arrived in Torquay, for the start of the conference, to a grey and miserable day. The weather reflected my mood. I just wanted answers and my life to make sense again. I was in a very anxious state (which I was in most of the time) as I entered the conference room and I sat as far away from everything as I could. Upstairs right at the back. I sat there wondering why the hell I was there. I just wanted to go home and have my life back.
I met up with Cindy afterwards and we headed into town to grab some lunch. My plan was to get some answers. Who was Jesus? Who was Satan? Who were the Reptilians? How did all this fit together? But once again, she failed to give me any real answers and I was incredibly frustrated. I travelled all this way for answers, but Cindy was failing to give them to me. She just brushed off my concerns about the global conspiracy and the Illuminati agenda with comments like “Just trust God” and “We can’t understand all of God’s ways”. Sorry but that simply wasn’t good enough! I needed to know why and how David Icke and others could potentially be so wrong about Christianity, when they seemed so spot on with everything else? Man it was driving me crazy!
After lunch we returned to the conference room and I sat with Cindy towards the front of the room. I felt a little more comfortable then I had done when I first arrived and did my best just to relax and try and take in what was happening and where I was. I listened to a number of Christian minsters as the day went on and really tried to understand the Christian perspective. I didn’t really connect with what they were saying a lot of the time though, but I continued to listen.
Towards the end of the evening the main speaker of the day, Joshua Mills, asked if there were any people in the audience who hadn’t been anointed in the name of Jesus and been “born again”. He invited anyone who hadn’t to come up on stage and be officially anointed by him. Once again I felt that nudge from inside. I turned to Cindy and said “I’m going up”. I joined 3 other people on stage and before I knew it I was being anointed by Joshua, in front of hundreds of people. I didn’t feel good about doing it, but I had listened to my intuition this far and I felt I needed to do it in order to understand more about Christianity and continue this journey.
The final day of the conferenece was a little less eventful and once it was all over I got back on the train and headed home. I arrived home feeling depressed and bewildered. I just wanted some type of normality and didn’t now how that was going to happen while I still had these massive questions circling around in my mind. My whole life felt like one big giant mess of confusion. I didn’t know who I was anymore. Where was this leading and how was this going to be resolved?
Cindy met me a couple of days later to say goodbye before leaving for California. I wondered what the hell I would be doing after she had gone. She was the only person I knew who even had the slightest idea what I was going through. But once again, the next steps of my journey were to present themselves at just the right moment.
Cindy was adamant that I buy my first Bible with her before she left, so she took me to a Christian bookstore to get me one. In the store was a young guy behind the counter, maybe 21, who Cindy got talking to. She introduced us and he went on to tell me that he went to a good church just out of town. He seemed to understand my experiences a little and I felt fairly comfortable in his company. I knew I had to get to that church as soon as I could. Maybe the answers I seeked were there. It certainly felt like I was supposed to meet this guy and I was being guided to this church.
Cindy was back in California now and I felt so alone and found it difficult to comprehend what had happened to my life. I just didn’t know what to believe anymore and I looked forward to meeting some new people who could potentially help me understand the mess I was in. The local church was the only obvious next step for me to take, but the first Sunday evening I arrived I walked in and walked straight out again. What the hell was I doing in a church! I didn’t want to be there and I felt angry. There was this battle in my mind and it was tearing me up. I was so sure that Religion was set up for control, but I’d had these ongoing “spiritual encounters” within Christian environments. Which way was I supposed to turn?
The next Sunday, I went to the church once again, but this time I walked in feeling slightly more relaxed and with a stronger willingness to find out why I had been lead to this particular church. As I entered the building the worship band were playing quite an upbeat song and I joined the crowd with a feeling of anticipation for what what I might discover or who I might meet. I was pleasantly surprised to find myself standing behind a bunch of guys about my age and instantly felt more comfortable.
Once the service was over I introduced myself and they were friendly and just seemed like ordinary guys, not some crazy “born again Christian types” and after chatting with them for a few minutes they told me I should meet David, the youth pastor. They often went round to his house after the service most Sundays and they seemed to all be pretty close with each other.
David was a pleasant guy, not much older then me and we seemed to have a connection right away. I felt a little more relaxed as I shared my experiences with him and was relieved to hear that he had had a similar experiences to me. He had been into the “new age” and dabbled into many different paths and ways of understanding before being “saved” and becoming a born again Christian. He wasn’t on my wavelength with regards to the global conspiracy, but it was comforting to find someone who could at least understand some of my perspective.
Over the coming weeks I attended the church every Sunday with the intention of learning more about Christianity and getting some of the answers I so desperately needed. I usually headed round to David’s afterwards and over the following weeks I made some friends, but I never really felt that close to anyone because there were still these massive question marks embedded in my mind over the truth about Christianity, the global conspiracy and the Reptilians and to my utter frustration all of these “Christians” were so blissfully ignorant of any of it. Things just didn’t feel right at all.
I continued to have regular phone contact with Cindy during this period and I spoke to her nearly every day for sometimes up to an hour. It felt kind of odd, as she would often call me up and say things like “the Lord told me to call you and go through John 22:10 in the Bible”. I would just go along with whatever she suggested though, believing she knew more than me.
I was still struggling massively with my health condition and most days were still pretty horrific. It was really the desire to regain my health that made me push forward with everything because I thought maybe a full healing could be found through this route. If Christianity was the true path then maybe ”Jesus” would heal me. But I just didn’t improve at all and my frustration and anger continued to build.
I was also continuing to have these “supernatural” experiences at home and sometimes at church involving a heavy energy pushing me down and a feeling of being light headed. It was these experiences that really made me believe I was on the right track, even though deep in my soul I knew something was very wrong with all of this.
I still searched for answers online throughout most of my days and I was finding it impossible to work on my home business or do anything else but listen to audio, watch videos and visit websites of Christian ministers who could potentially further my understanding. But as the weeks turned into months I was just feeling more and more trapped and confused. I didn’t know who I was, what I was supposed to be doing and when life would make sense again.
The guys at the church, including David, were very sincere in their beliefs and they all had constant “spiritual” experiences at Church and at home as well, but they just appeared to be so naive about what was happening in the world. Whenever I would ask questions (and I asked a lot) most of their answers began with “well, it says in the Bible…”. I remember thinking “well, what if the Bible is wrong?” I mean if these people, Christians, are God’s “chosen people” and he can directly communicate with many of them, like Cindy, then why the hell aren’t these people informed about what’s going on in the world?
It was now October 2008 and I just kept pondering the Reptilian connection to all of this, just like that line in the Matrix “It’s like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad”. Were the Reptilians simply Satan’s demons? Were the Reptilians actually responsible for my “spiritual” experiences? Was David Icke and others just part of a clever Satanic agenda to take people away from Jesus and true salvation? Who were these Reptilian beings?
As I studied and re-studied passages from the Bible, particularly in the book of Revelations, listened to huge numbers of Christian ministers talking about “the end times”, the Illuminati, Satan, Jesus, the Holy Spirit and Sin I just wasn’t happy with the overall picture I was being presented with. The Christian perspective just seemed to be messing massive pieces of the puzzle. What was the true situation here? I was losing hope. But after months of searching for any and all information linking the Reptilians into the Christian perspective I eventually came across Peggy Kane’s interview once again.
Like I said, I had listened to Peggy’s interview a year previously, but this time I initially had resistance to watching it, because I knew she didn’t exactly support the idea of Christianity. But I hit play anyway and as the interview continued to run, my feeling of connection to what she was saying was immense. It was a KNOWING. I just knew that she was speaking truth. It wasn’t my mind in play here. My mind that had been searching for answers for so many months, without any rest, was beginning to become quiet as this knowing took over. It was a feeling that I had missed.
A new flow of energy was pouring into me and I felt like I was coming to life again and reconnecting to my true self once more. I watched the entire 2 hour interview with this feeling of connection running through me the entire time and once it had finished I realised that there was a link to Peggy’s website. The first time I’d watched her interview, the year before, I didn’t see the link to her website, or maybe it wasn’t there, but this time I was excited to hit the link and arrive at her site.
It was a very basic looking website, no fancy graphics or attention grabbing colour, but this seemed to create a relaxed tone around her information. Like she didn’t need to shout about anything. I spent the next 5 days straight studying every last piece of information she had to share. I listened to Peggy’s reversals of George Bush, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld, Tony Blair, the Queen, Religious figures from around the world, newsreaders, politicians, astronauts, new age gurus and a whole host of different people and it became clearer and clearer that reverse speech was revealing the truth!
Peggy’s findings were absolutely mindblowing! Everyone in reverse was revealing the truth and the overall picture of what was happening on our planet. It was like reverse speech was acting as a “TRUTH SERUM”. George Bush Jr was revealing, in reverse, their involvement in 9/11. Dick Cheney was revealing the lies told about the Iraq war, it went on and on and there was simply no variation on the picture being painted. Nearly everything David Icke and others had been saying was being backed up by reverse speech. The reptilian agenda was being exposed by reverse speech in a more detailed way then any other form of information I had ever come across.
This was incredibly liberating for me. My confusion was beginning to be replaced by a deep understanding and an incredible knowing. Peggy had developed such an intricate understanding about the Reptilians and what was really happening on our planet. I began to understand the true scale of the Reptilian’s manipulation of humanity. We were living in a total “hall of mirrors” here on this planet and everywhere you turned there was manipulation and deception and reverse speech was helping us see through the fog of lies and deceit.
But even though I was convinced that reverse speech was revealing the truth about the Reptilians and what was really taking place on this planet, I certainly wasn’t calm yet. What the hell had I been experiencing with these “supernatural” encounters? They were tangible experiences. It happened! What was really going on with Christianity?
Peggy Kane, through her reverse speech research, was very clear that all Religions, including Christianity, were set up by the Reptilians for manipulation and control. I resonated with this and it backed up what so many other researchers were saying, but there was still no clear explanation to tell me what was taking place with these “encounters”. I still wasn’t totally sure what was real and what was a lie and the problem with coming from a Christian perspective is that it is full of fear. If you fall for “Satan’s lies” then you will spend eternity burning in hell! I had to work it out.
I sat for long periods with my notebook trying to make sense of of it all. I wrote the arguments for both the Christian perspective and the one being presented by David Icke, Peggy Kane and others. It was a confusing mess to jumble with. Was Satan responsible for reverse speech? Was it all a massive manipulation in order to send people like me to hell? Man this was heavy duty shit and it wasn’t easy trying to wrap my mind around it while still very much suffering from severe anxiety and not being able to think straight.
My belief was certainly leaning towards Christianity being a control structure of the Reptilians. After all, Peggy herself, had a number of clear reversals from Christians speaking against Christianity in reverse. But I just needed something a bit more concrete before I could finally rest. That was when I decided to try reversing for myself.
I knew how to handle audio and play around with it, due to the music production set up I had on my computer, so it wasn’t difficult for me to dive into. But who should I reverse first? The person who jumped into my mind almost instantly was Joshua Mills, the Christian minister who had anointed me as a born again Christian, at the conference in Torquay. Yes, he was the man. I quickly jumped onto Youtube and found a video of him talking about an encounter with an ”angel”. I downloaded the video and copied the audio into my software. I felt the importance of this moment very strongly as I hit play and began to listen to Joshua’s audio in reverse.
I was nervous, because I knew that what I heard within this audio could potentially change the direction of my entire life and lay the foundation for my entire belief system. I hit play hesitantly and began to listen. Things seemed to become blurry around me as my mind tried to focus on the backwards audio. It was just gibberish. Nothing sounded anything remotely like English and after 30 seconds I became disheartened and doubted whether I would actually hear anything at all. But just as this doubt began to consume my mind, an English phrase lifted out of the gibberish. “The Owl Will Use”. Shit! That was quite clear among the gibberish. Did I just imagine that? I hit stop and replayed that section. No, it was there! Man, I’ve got something! I saved it and carried on listening to the rest of the audio. The next audible phrase lifted out of the gibberish, then another, then another. My god! By the time I’d reached the end of the 7 minute audio, I had 11 clear, audible, phrases!
I was absolutely blown away as I heard reversal after reversal of Joshua speaking about “snake” and “rape” and these reversals were much clearer then the majority Peggy had on her website (on average only 5-10 % of reversals are really clear). This was just amazing for me to hear! Here was a guy that had anointed me on stage, in front of hundreds of people in the name of Jesus, speaking about a Reptilian disguised as an angel, raping him! Holy Shit indeed!
Even though this was convincing on it’s own, I knew I needed more data if I was going to come to a final conclusion on this. I quickly went back to Youtube and found a number of other Christian ministers that I had listened to during the previous few months. I did the same thing and listened to their audio in reverse. One by one, they all said the same, or very similar things, about the “holy spirit”, Jesus and the Bible in reverse. DECEPTION, MANIPULATION, LIES and RAPE.
It was starting to make sense. These “supernatural” encounters with the “holy spirit” weren’t divine at all, but where somehow being created by the Reptilians, in order for them to feed from that energy. Crazy shit man! Crazy shit. (All these reversals are in the Religion section of this site)
This was a difficult conclusion to fully understand, but it certainly felt correct. If these Reptilian entities understood the human mind like the back of their hands, had technology so far beyond humans and are multi-dimensional in nature, then I’m sure they wouldn’t have much trouble creating “supernatural” experiences for people.
I have continued to conduct my own reverse speech research since that day in October 2008 and have followed Peggy Kane every step of the way as well. I owe her an amazing debt of gratitude. Without her and her dedication to uncovering the truth I would still be living in a mess of total confusion. She has literally saved my life. And no, that’s not an exaggeration. What I have learnt from this amazing women is absolutely priceless and she has helped many others throw off the shackles of confusion and manipulation as well. Together, Peggy Kane and David Icke have proven to be incredible light-bearers and bringers of truth. I owe them a lot and look forward to one day shaking their hand and giving them a big hug.
I am still very much on my journey and I feel like I’ve only just got started really! There is still so much more to know about the Reptilians, the nature of reality, the greater universe and who and what we really are. But truth can’t be stopped now. All forms of information are valuable, but Reverse Speech is very special and has helped me gain so much clarity. I intend to keep moving forward and sharing my findings and if I help just one other person open their minds to a greater extent, then my mission here has been a success and all the pain I’ve gone through over the past 5 years would of been worth it. The ending to this mess is going to be beautiful beyond words and that’s what I’m working towards and looking forward to
I now understand why I went through that 5 month period of total confusion as a “born again Christian”. I was ment to do it. I had to experience how powerful the Reptilian’s manipulation of humanity had been within Religion for myself. Much like an agent working behind enemy lines in order to truly understand the enemy. I’m glad it’s over though.
I am also still very much in my own personal battle with my health and even though I have made progress over the past 5 years, I often doubt whether I will become fully well again, but these doubts are always fleeting. I know, deep down, where it counts, that freedom for me and the whole of humanity, on ALL LEVELS, is within sight and coming closer by the hour. I have learnt to do all I can, with what I’ve got, from where I am and whenever things get too much I do my best to pick myself up, dust myself down and just carry on.
I have a constant reminder on my wall which simply reads; Courage, Faith, Patience, Perseverance. These 4 words drive me forward everyday and I know things are soon to be incredible on this planet, on a level we can’t possibly imagine. It’s that vision that keeps me moving forward in the face of severe obstacles and challenges.
I’ve shared my story here for you so that you can connect with the real human being behind this website and the person giving you this information. I’m someone just like you, who’s on an amazing journey, has endured incredible challenges and has experienced some amazing things! I hope you’ve enjoyed hearing my story (so far) and have gained value from it. I know your story is just as eventful though!
I’ll see you at the party after all this bullshit is over and we’ll celebrate like we’ve never celebrated before.
And if you have any questions then be sure to let me know.